Exit
by Mordred LeFay
Summary: Songfic. Rejected by Rogue after she finds out about his past, Remy looks for a way out.


Author's note: The song is "Exit" by U2 off the Joshua Tree album. I got the lyrics from the U2 Lyrics Archive (http://lyrics.interference.com/u2/index.html). I was listening to the song and this story popped in my head. Sorry fellow Remy fans! I just couldn't resist using the song and writing something dramatic and tragic.

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Exit

By Mordred LeFay

  


_You know he got the cure   
You know he went astray   
He used to stay awake  
To drive the dreams he had away  
He wanted to believe  
In the hands of love_

  


He used to be safe. No one knew, not even her. Sometimes he even convinced himself that none of it had happened. The Morlocks were safe and his hands were clean. He was happy, a married man, and the woman he'd loved for years could finally touch him. He had atoned for his sins, repented and done his penance. The dreams began to fade, the guilt he could push away. Former thief, former leader in a massacre of his own kind, Remy LeBeau was finally a respectable man. Then it all fell apart.

  


_His head it felt heavy  
As he cut across the land  
A dog started crying  
Like a broken hearted man  
At the howling wind  
At the howling wind_

Gambit stalked along the edge of the cliffs, watching the moon rise and the waves crash on jagged rocks below. Far away from any living soul, he stood and glared at the night sky. No one would ever find him here. The wind whipped his coat around him, biting cold chilling him to the bone. He didn't care. He was already numb inside. _She knows everything_. It was all over.

  


_He went deeper into black  
Deeper into white  
Could see the stars shining  
Like nails in the night  
He felt the healing  
Healing, healing  
Healing hands of love  
Like the stars shiny shiny  
From above_

  


He remembered the first moment Rogue could touch him without fear. Her skin was so soft, just like he had imagined it. He remembered the first time they made love, their entire bodies touching skin to skin, no fear and no hurt. He closed his eyes in pain. He could feel her touch, her lips, if he imagined hard enough. He also remembered the last time they touched, when her powers came back without warning, the weakening feeling, her shock and then anger as she realized everything he'd been holding back from her.

  


_Hand in the pocket  
Finger on the steel  
The pistol weighed heavy  
His heart he could feel  
Was beating, beating  
Beating, beating oh my love  
Oh my love, oh my love  
Oh my love_

  


He wanted to die then, when he saw the scorn in her eyes. She knew. He had stolen her engagement ring, their wedding rings, stolen everything he had given her. And she knew about his past, everything he hoped he could hide from her forever. "How could ya, Remy? How could ya do that to those poor people? They hadn't done nuthin'. It was all for money, you greedy bastard! All ya care about is money!" She shook with rage. "You ain't the man I thought you were, Remy LeBeau. You ain't the man ah fell in love with. You sicken me. You lied to me. Get out. Ah neva' wanna see your face again!"

He begged her to finish it. He couldn't live without her. _Kiss me, hold me. If I'm gonna die, I wanna be in your arms, chere. Please Roguey... let me touch you one last time._

  


_My love_

  


She had refused. He'd have to do it his own way. He meant what he'd said, even if she didn't believe it. The world had been soiled by his presence long enough. Remy turned his back on the night. If he did this right, he would be knocked back and over the edge to fall into the surf, onto the jagged rocks below. No way was he going half-assed on this, no surviving paralyzed or a vegetable that she would be obligated to care for. He owed Rogue that much.

  


_Saw the hands that build  
Can also pull down_

  


With trembling fingers he reached into his pocket and pulled out the pistol. He disengaged the safety and stuck the barrel into his mouth. Hot tears slid down his cheeks but up until the end every thought was of her. _Forgive me, mon chere, _he thought as he pulled the trigger.

  


_The hands of love_

  


  



End file.
